There are so many Brooklyn novelists. Continue Reading

Today is the day, my single friends. Continue Reading

Does everyone realize just how awesome it is to be single this weekend? Continue Reading

I watched “The Searchers” last night. Continue Reading

Yeah, like next week. But it’s on everyone’s mind. No one wants to spend it alone. And the shackled are thinking about what to get each other, awwww. You guys make me sick/jealous. Anyway, from now until next week, I’ll drop hints about what to do if you’re single or with your significant other.

1. Momo Sushi Shack: This place is under the radar, but it’s a nice joint for couples. The tapas style Japanese food is good, and although they don’t have a liquor license yet, so what? You’re with your partner, you should at least be able to hang out during dinner without getting drunk. Fuckin alkies.

2. Mile End: Yeah, you could go here if you’re a couple and you’re comfortable wiping mustard from the corner of each other’s mouths. If you don’t like it fatty, call for the lean pastrami. Overall, a pretty rockin’ joint. And who knows, you might be able to pick someone up at the counter.

3. Bushwick Country Club: This bar is perfect for singles and doubles alike. Their retro photos cost $3, so hop in with your partner or try if you’re single I’d fuck you if tried picking me up by asking, “Wanna take a photo?”

Have fun everyone, spring is around the corner!

Gov. Cuomo has approved a bunch of new cuts. Continue Reading