That was my first New York earthquake. It was my first earthquake ever, actually, which I’m ashamed to say, especially since I used to live on the West Coast, earthquake central. People would always be like, hey did you feel that earthquake last night? And I’d be like, no. I didn’t.

Unfortunately I was right in the middle of urinating and so it wasn’t as much fun for me as it was for you. At first I was like, why is the train rumbling so loudly? Then I realized there is no train in this part of Brooklyn. But still it was pretty cool thinking about what was happening underneath the floor I stood on, deep in the earth’s molten core.

Now I want to be a professional earthquake wrestler. That was a baby earthquake but what about a big one? How cool would that be, if I traveled the world waiting for the next big earthquake. I’d be like the Bear Grylls of earthquakes.

But at least I was part of the Great American Earthquake. It’s been a long time since the East Coast has had an earthquake. And it will probably be a long time till the next one. At least I can say I remember when.